Subject: She’s way too comfortable
Dear Steve and Shirley, I am a 29-year-old man and I was dating an almost perfect woman until recently. We met at the wedding of one of my oldest friends and my friend had lots of great things to say about her. That was 7 months ago and we were taking time to get to know each other. She’s two years older than me and further along in her career than I am, but she’s never made a big deal out of it. We started attending church together right away and I’ve met her family and friends and she’s met my mother. My mother didn’t have much to say about her and that bothered me. A few weeks later, my mother called me and said my girlfriend has the mannerisms of a trifling woman. She told me that my kitchen should’ve been clean and there should’ve been the basic things like an adequate amount of bottled water and liquid soap in the kitchen and both of my bathrooms. I didn’t know what that meant until recently when I started leaving my girlfriend alone at my house when I go on work trips. I came home one day to find her dirty clothes in a pile on the floor of my closet and she said she didn’t know where else to put them. The bed looked like it hadn’t been made up since I left. She said she intended to wash the sheets before I came home. That’s not half of it though. She now comes into the bathroom and uses the bathroom while I’m in the shower or brushing my teeth. She’s spent every night at my house since then and whenever she goes back to her house, she brings more clothes to my guest room. My mother was right and I wish I had paid more attention. I want to be with her but she’s too comfortable and taking over my home. How do I slow things down a bit and get her back into her own house?